Monday, October 27, 2008

Fear + humilation = peeing in my pants.

I live on the 20th floor. I rarely use the stairs in my building (once I walked down them because the elevator was broken - it was an experience).

Today, I took my recycling down to the little apartment recycling area, on the first floor (not to be confused with the ground floor because that would be silly). I dropped the appropriate plastic in the plastic bin, the aluminum in the aluminum bin, etc.

As I left the area-of-the-bins, I said to myself, "Don't be that girl, take the stairs." So, I pushed open the door to the stairwell, and marched down a flight of stairs. Which turned into a cement corridor that made me, frankly, quite uncomfortable. So, I got to the end of the corridor and my sense of direction was telling me this couldn't possibly be the correct exit, but my sense of direction is so often WRONG, you know? It's best to ignore it.

I push open the door, and stick my head out to try and get my bearings. And the fire alarm goes off. I've set off the fire alarm. And it is LOUD. And the door seems to vibrate under my touch. I shut the door as quickly as possible and start to RUN. Maybe no one will notice that the alarm is blaring and there just happens to be a girl with a red raincoat charging up the stairs? By the time I reach the stairwell, the alarm has ceased, but I fell like I've been electrocuted. My heart is racing, my ears are ringing, I can feel my heart beat in my stomach (never a good sign), and after an awkward conversation with the guy in an elevator about going up or down (that's what she said?); I walked as briskly as my average length legs could carry me out of the building.

And that my friends is what happens when you use the ground floor stairwell to exit the building, your welcome.


  1. 1) Your intentions to climb the stairs was admirable. 2) Never ignore the sense that something could be wrong - investigate. 3) I love that you have a red raincoat. 4) I love that you ran - panic + run = safe - in my book.

    And, thank you.

  2. I would've piddled right then and there, as I was holding the vibrating door. LOL!

  3. Chris - Your Welcome! I greatly enjoy my red raincoat also, people in Australia don't seem to wear raincoats but prefer the umbrella. Amateurs.

    Burn - Seriously, it was magic that I didn't have to go back to my apartment and shower again. All signs pointed to "an accident"

  4. I hope you learned your lesson. No good deed goes unpunished. No, not that one. The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.

    xoxo, SG

  5. How about "the road to Hell is paved with pee"?

  6. Love this story, sounds like something I would do!! :)