Monday, March 30, 2009


As I walked around campus today, I saw construction workers shovelling wet concrete. I wanted to stick my hands in it.

The girl living below me has played the same Police song (Can't Stand Losing You) and the same Talking Heads song (I Want to Live) over and over and over and over again this weekend. I like both songs - but could do with a break.

I am the stage of a crush where I doodle his name on my trapper keeper, write my name with his with little hearts, and have all the hope in the world that some day (like now?) he'll be as smitten with me as I am with him-the song I'd be playing over and over is Paul Simon's Gumboots
"So what are you going to do about it
That's what I'd like to know.
You don't feel you could love me
But I feel you could."
Nothings happened. Literally nothing. But I'm so smitten. Uncontrollably giddy. Elated. Jubilant. The truth is I have no real indication of his feelings at all - and I am trying not to get all into "reading the signs" because seriously...I'm just trying to enjoy each IM conversation for what being smitten - with a boy - who wants to talk to me. That thumping you hear...that's my heart.

I got so angry at myself today, I just couldn't articulate my argument my ideas to a classroom of my peers. I got so frustrated and annoyed, why couldn't I just say all the thoughts in my head? Why didn't they come out in a logical systematic way? WHAT HAPPENED?

Am smitten. Be cool. LOVE YOU. Ahem.

I made my cousin laugh over a piece of writing I did. She laughed over something I wrote - could I actually be good at this? She Laughed.


  1. Haha, I laugh at what you write everyday :p Of course you're good at it!

  2. Of course you're good at this! I think it's adorable that you're smitten. I hope he returns the thumping heart vibrations... Would be so nice.

  3. Yup, you ARE good at it! I fall into smittenhood so easily that I really have to smack myself repeatedly and remind myself to play it cool.

    (It never works.)

    But I'm giddy with you!

  4. Becky - You're a sweetheart!

    Chris - Thanks! sometimes I think he does...sometimes I am not so sure. Trying to keep it real(istic)

    Jummy - Thank you! I hear ya - I've heard the giddy feeling is just the feeling of "what if" like "what if he calls?" "what if he likes me" "what if he kisses me" which kind of takes the magic out of the it, doesn't it?

  5. Oh -- that's such a wonderful feeling ... being smitten. I didn't realize how much I miss it until I read your post!