Monday, January 10, 2011

Hands off my French Aussie guy, lady.

Recently, the only thing that would have made my life better (besides a job) was a smoothie. Now a key component to making a good smoothie is owning a blender which until Christmas my only kitchen appliances were a super dull knife that I can't use to cut anything and a cast iron pan.

For Christmas, Inspector Climate bought me an ice cream maker. Oh, delicious ice cream, you will be mine all mine. nom nom nom. Now to make real ice cream you have to make a custard that involves eggs and thermometers and lordy, I'm exhausted just thinking about it. However, somewhere my sister in law found a deliciously, creamy and easy ice cream recipe that involves 4 ingredients (I'll pass the recipe on in a later post...promise!). But you know what else you need...a blender.

So, on Saturday, after yoga - of course, Inspector Climate and I went to Myer to buy a blender. I'd already done some research online as to what kind of blender I wanted. And you know if they could do things like crush ice as well as provide other blenderly functions, like you know blend stuff. But I wanted some more blenderly advice because I've used some bad blenders in my day.

This Myer Employee (ME) walks up to us and I ask him for some advice on which Blender to get. During this conversation, he talks almost exclusively to Inspector Climate and ignores me completely. Even though I am the one asking the questions and explaining what I need in a blender. This only made me feel like ME thought women were second class citizens unable to make a smart choice involving kitchen appliances - that's just stellar costumer service Myer.

We also got a history lesson in this guy's past careers. Most recently a hair dresser where it was important to get the best quality scissors for hair cutting purposes. And scissors are like, totally, like blenders you know? You want to get a blender that is going to blend, like, frequently. On monthly, or fortnightly, or even weekly use. Like, you know, scissors.

I finally decide on a blender, pick it up and carry it to the register. I reach into my wallet to pay with cash. ME opens the register and realises that he doesn't have enough change to give me, so he reaches into his own pocket to get some more change while calling out to ME1 and ME2 and asking them where to get more change. ME1 and ME2 stroll over. "You were going to give them change of your own? That's like, weird" ME1 declares.

ME to Inspector Climate (who remember he has been talking SOLELY to this whole time) "So, um, do you like speak English?"

Inspector Climate: um, yeah

ME: So you're not, like, foreign?

IC: No.

ME2: Oh so where you from?

Deidre: He's from Australia...

IC: yeah...yeah...

ME2 clearly not listening to us, "Are you French? Because PrrrRAWR" she purred - literally.

IC: No, I am Australian.

Lessons to be learned from this:

1. I am Australian.
2. Inspector Climate is French.
3. Inspector Climate is foxy*. Rawr.

*To be fair, this one is a truth fact.


  1. Hahaha I loved this story. Sales assistants make me laugh, and not in a very good way.

  2. Oh, that's one thing that's guaranteed to raise my hackles, the shop assistant who only talks to the man. I once even had a shop assistant hand change back to my partner despite me handing over the money! Outrageous.

    I hope you enjoy your blender and home made ice cream.

    Also, make with the recipe soon pls.

  3. Now you can make your own Ben and Jerry's!

  4. Customer service has just gone down the tubes...Funny story though!

  5. Hahah that is such a funny story. I really love the way you write:) Cant wait to read more of your posts and wish you a great day

  6. Miss Liv - I know funny, but not so much in a Funny ha-ha way...more funny awkward.

    Frisky Librarian - I am planning a whole icecream making post! I just have to make ice cream first. I promise!

    Dinky Di - Awesome! Thanks for the recipe

    Connie - WAY down the tubes.

    Diana - Thank you! That's so sweet.

  7. Shop assistants can be ridiculous sometimes! I hate when they give change back to my husband despite ME paying lol...

    Good luck with the ice cream!! 4 ingredients sounds like my kind of recipe :)

  8. Teacher girl - I know right! I can't stop calling him my french guy, and occasionally purring at him. It totally cracks me up.

    Krysten - Thanks!

    Emily Jane - I know right? What's with that! In his defense, he did give the change back to me, but continued talking to Inspector Climate solely.

  9. But de franch, dey are so sexy, yes?

  10. Only thing worse than an obnoxious sales clerk; a sales clerk who *knew* your husband back in the day, and now wants to flaunt her fake ooboos all up in his biz.
    Yeah, I have never been more invisible.
    Which is why I faked deafness, then interrupted the scene by yelling in my fake deaf voice ... fake sign language going on too .... "Oh mih Gohd! Hewr oobs look show fake!" - insert fake deaf laughter.

    I feel your pain, but sometimes you just have to laugh. ;)