Thursday, August 25, 2011

Waiting and seeing...(with a pinch of "How I Pictured It")

A couple of posts ago, I left you with a  bit of a cliff hanger.  I'd apologise for that except that is exactly how I feel.  I am hanging off the cliff hoping someone will tell me it's ok to jump.  Because I am ready.  I'd rather be jumping and making the mistake then hanging here waiting.

You see, I've been waiting for my visa to get approved for 18 months. It is only a 18 month visa and my further progress in immigrating here means that it needs to be approved AND I need to get a job in my 'field' for 12 of the 18 months of the visa.  Are we all clear on the details.

Well, the day before the hospital visit, I received an email from my lawyer which said that the process of them approving my visa is starting which means that I have to re-do all the tests that I've already done like the medical test where I need to get more chest xrays, tested for HIV, and a bunch of other stuff because the tests expire after one year. And I might have to get my English test retaken.

Has that sunk in. The English test.  The English test I already took (and passed with flying colours, one might add), and is the only language I speak. Yes, that English test.  Those results have potentially "expired".

It is the most ludicrous thing ever.  And of course, I have to pay for them all again.  When it's not my fault that apparently I'm a "low priority" and so it took them so long to process the stupid pieces of paper.

I also need to get an FBI test where I need to mail my fingerprints to the FBI and a police check here.  So that's hundreds of dollars in tests that I've already completed. Just talking about this makes my blood pressure rise and steam come out of my ears.

To add insult to injury, I went to have a meeting with my lawyer to see if there were better options.  Inspector Climate and I haven't been living together long enough for us to be "de facto" and we would have to wait until July 2012 to able to apply for that visa. What my lawyer did say was basically "I don't see you getting a job in your appointed field for 12 months."

That's heart warming isn't it? I am so glad he believes in me.  Of course part of his reservation is that the requirements are incredibly specific and most of the jobs I WANT to get wouldn't even comply.

He strongly suggested that Inspector Climate and I consider getting married (of course, not for the visa).  This is not how Inspector Climate and I pictured getting married, in fact we picture getting married in my mom's garden with our immediate family and gluten free vegetarian organic food piled on plates (ok, maybe that's just my dream).  We want to get married in leaf peeper season when the leaves are orange and red and yellow and we want Kyle Hepp and Seba to take our pictures (wedding tentatively planned for 2013 or 2014...Kyle be prepared to be in New England in September - I jest...sort of).  This is, clearly, not the first time Inspector Climate and I have talked about marriage, in fact we talk about it quite a lot. But this is the first time we talked about marriage in that we'd be getting married in just a few months.

To be honest, I was kind of excited about it. I love him, I plan on spending the rest of my life with him. Why not get married here with his grandparents present and call it day and have our "real" ceremony later when we planned on it?  Inspector Climate is...less ready, and that's ok (and keeps saying the wrong things like "If I have to marry you, I will"  what every girl wants to hear).  He would much prefer for an impromptu courthouse wedding to be the last resort and would like the wedding that we pictured to be, you know, the real wedding.  And how can I argue with that?

To add confusion to this, there is no point in us getting married if this current approval process takes more than 7 months from now - because then we'd be nearly de facto anyway and applying for the new visa would take a while (which means that the current tests I am taking would expire and I'd have to pay for them again).  But if the current approval process happens quickly then it makes sense to get married in hopes that THAT visa will go through quickly enough for me to not have to get more chest xrays and take more English tests, potentially.

So basically, we're just waiting and seeing.  Waiting to see what hoops to jump through next and waiting on things we can't control (how quickly does the FBI turn around finger prints?).  We're waiting and seeing how my most recent email to my lawyer filled with questions and queries about the future state of my life in Australia, my relationship, and my job status will be answered.  The man takes days to respond to things, it's ok dude take your time, it's only questions about MARRIAGE (which by the way is not how I thought I would be getting proposed to via my lawyer. Romantic) and my very existence.  It's cool, take your time.

It is stressful and exhausting.

So basically, I have no more information to give you. I potentially might be getting married in the next few months or maybe the next few years. I guess we're engaged to be in engaged.  We're waiting and seeing.


  1. oh my heavens! i'm not sure what to say, i feel so confused just THINKING about your situation! i can only imagine how confusing it must be to experience this. well... dannon and i got married without ever signing any legal documentation AT ALL, and we feel married. so maybe it works the other way too? maybe you can just sign the paperwork, thinking about it as just being another set of VISA papers and not feel married until you have a wedding ceremony.

    of course, i'm trying to problem solve your situation which may be overstepping my bounds. i really feel for you. what a huge fork in the road this is. just... hugs!

  2. Oh man, this is such a bummer. I really hope it all works out for you. I'm sure something will work out. It has to.

  3. wow, this seems so much more complicated than when friends of mine have had to do it but i guess everyone's circumstances are different. the joys of government beauracracy!

    i can't even imagine how stressful and frustrating this all is for you, but i hope your lawyer gets his act together soon and that all of this stuff gets sorted quicker than you expect!

  4. Why don't you two just move back here!! Yes!

  5. OMG, you poor things! I have to confess I cracked up at "If I have to marry you, I will." I give you enormous credit, Deidre, you have an indomitable spirit and you always retain your sense of humor, no matter what poop life hands you.

  6. This is so much for you to have on your plate! I cannot believe that the process of staying in Australia is so complex and confusing, especially for an American. We like speak the same language! I hope that things get a little easier and clearer in the coming days. *hugs*

  7. OH BOY. This is just all to close to home for me.

    Honestly? My best advice is elope. DO NOT DRAW OUT THE PROCESS OR THE PROCESS WILL DRAW YOU OUT.

    Email me if you have more questions. Also? Sounds like you lawyer is as big a dick as mine!!

  8. It really seems someone is making money of this..and it's not you. But I think its that way even in this States..if its testing for teaching or even getting your license to wax people..always another test to take.

    This makes me think of the movie LIKE CRAZY where the English girl has to leave the states and her boyfriend behind over her Visa.

    Oh..and guys here use that line too..about marriage. Although, I'm not in any hurry, either. Hopefully, a job will come through in your field. Keep networking.

  9. All that would be so confusing! No wonder your head is spinning. I wish you the best of luck with all of it!

  10. Yeesh. I hope things magically work out for you. And soon. And that you don't have to get married sooner rather than later for your Visa. Ugh. How 'bout I shoot out darts of positive energy in Australia's general direction? This could help... ;-) Keeping my fingers crossed!

  11. Awww dude, I feel your pain as I was in a very similar situation not so long ago (ok, well about 6 years now, but it feels like yesterday). And here I thought France's admin system was eff'd up...Australia seems like a strong contender for the "ridiculous Visa application process" of the year award.

    Let me know if you need help studying for your English test. I am a former English teacher after all. ;)

  12. huh, i like that, engaged to be engaged. that's a cool concept! :)

    wherever life takes your relationship, i hope you are happy! :)

    <3, Mimi

  13. Oh no! I'm feeling your pain as I'm currently living in the UK (with a visa that expires in April) trying to get my Canadian visa (so my husband, baby, and I will be able to move to the same country when we're done here), but we have similar problems. Some things are taking so long that the medical and UK police certificate are expiring. I've been working on my FBI portion since March. My fingerprints have been rejcted 3 times and the FBI has taken 6-8 weeks to return my rejection results each time. I hope you have better luck. I will tell you, since I've already had to speak to the FBI about their rotten procedure that you are allowed to (and should) send up to 5 sets of prints at one time and that you should try to moisturize your fingers as much as possible (they say to sleep with vaseline and gloves on your hands for 3 nights) before being fingerprinted, because dry fingers are a major cause of fingerprint failure. Good luck to you. I hope it all works out well.

  14. Holy crap...if I have to marry I will. That is just awesome. And the fact that you have to take an English test? Priceless. Man...I hope things get better for ya. Or at least Inspector Climate gets a little more romantic

  15. Bureaucracy is such a mess, isn't it? It's not like you're some troublemaker that's going to lay waste to the country. So I guess...a congrats is in order? :) I really hope everything works out for you and soon!

  16. Oh lord!! That does sound so confusing... I'm so sorry you're in the middle of all this rubble :(( I can only imagine how trying and frustrating it must be :( Best o' Luck dear... hope things start untangling asap! xx

  17. Wow that's all very confusing! Hope it all turns out ok for you! I hate all legal government stuff, it's always so pointless and unfair! <3

  18. What a nightmare. Reminds me of the time I was in London and no one would hire me because I didn't have a bank account. And I couldn't get a bank account because I didn't have proof of residence. And I could get proof of residence because I couldn't get a freaking job!

    Anyways, a friend of mine recently told me that her Canadian Immigration forms were delayed... they've basically told her that they acknowledge that her visa was supposed to be approved in November 2010 but that there's a backlog and there's nothing they can do about it. Worse still, that they can't approve it now, they have to complete processing from January this year to August to get up to date - before they can deal with last years backlog!

    I long for a time when border control was crossing the street.

  19. Oh my gosh, this all sounds so stressful. I'll be thinking about you and sending good vibes!!

  20. Oh my gosh, what a total nightmare of paperwork. It's crazy isn't it, how you have these plans that are so simple in food, pretty fall colors, photographer friends...and then you have to go through all this visa and paperwork rigamarole and it complicates everything so much.

    I'm excited though, this wedding in the future does sound pretty amazing. And I'm not going to lie, it makes me like you even more than I already did that you wrote Kyle Hepp and Seba. He won't let me mention him ever in regards to giving him credit for pictures he takes and I wanted to change the business name but he won't. So I LOVE it that you still remembered to mention him anyways. Thanks, I'm going to show him this post and he'll feel special :)

  21. Oh what a frustrating experience!!! The whole visa process is just so ridiculous, my sister's boyfriend is going through the same thing. Good luck with everything!!!!!!! xoxoxo

  22. Man, I totally heart him and his wrong responses to the marriage question. Unbelievable. I also heart petty bureaucracy that makes you fork over a ton of money for redoing tests in your native language. What I actually love is how you manage to keep a sense of humor about all of it. Waiting to hear how it all turns out!

  23. Oh my goodness..what decisions to make. But engaged to be engaged is good. At least you know the end result, it's just a matter of when. ;)

  24. How stressful! Hope you can get it all worked out!

  25. aye aye aye. Immigration is never fun. Bureaucracy is never fun. Marriage is never ...

    oh wait. No, just kidding. I don't suppose you guys would consider going elsewhere together to give your relationship more time and then going back to Australia when the knot is good and tied?

  26. My bp jumped a few points just reading this. I"m sorry that this is so stressful for you!! Maybe a bad time to share that 'that which does not kill you only makes you stronger'? Yeah... probably. :P

    Seriously though, oye. Keep your chin up, though, and things will work themselves out (eventually) and hopefully before all this hoopla lands you in the poor house.

  27. Oh gosh I feel your pain! Having just gone through a year of bureaucratic BS myself. Sending you big hugs!!!

  28. I feel confused ...your situation sounds so difficult. Good luck with it all!

  29. Man, I feel your pain and do not envy you! What a stressful thing to go through. Luckily I have a two-year visa for the UK so I don t have to worry about being able to stay in the country for the next little while... Stay strong, lady! A wedding in the next few months does sound exciting, though... :-)

  30. I just had my FBI prints done for adoption and it took two months to get my results back. Good luck with everything. You can always have two weddings. One for paperwork and one later for family and friends.

  31. that is just crazy hard.

    And confusing.

    I need a lie down after reading that, it is like negotiating the disability maze.

  32. Wow, that is one of a confusing situation!! I'm sorry you have to go through this and I hope it all works out soon.

  33. I don't know whether to congratulate or commiserate! It is a shame that something that should be a wonderful moment of your life has become so wrapped up in red tape though.

  34. Kimbirdy - We definitely talked about that. The problem is that we have to tell everyone we're married so that it is a legit marriage in the eyes of the government - which makes it kind of hard to act like we're not very married!

    Iris - Thank you! It will definitely work out, but it kind of sucks sometimes along the way.

    SJ - It definitely depends on how you enter the country and what kind of visa's you've had and/or are applying for.

    The Zadge - Someday!

    Susan - I try to see the silly in the not so great :)

    Teachergirl - It is emotionally draining to say the least! Everything about the process is a challenge.

    Ev Rev - I know I worry about just making this whole thing last longer...and we definitely have a date where this shiznit needs to be complete!

    Ellie - Definitely not me getting the moolah!

    Amy - Thank you! It's just so hard to know what is the right choice.

    Jennifer - Please do shoot some positive darts at Australia! I love me some positive darts!

    Crystal - You've been married for 6 years! I had no idea! No wonder you need to get out of Paris.

    Mimi - I think I try to define something to make me feel like I have any control over what's happening.

    MBC - AGH! This totally terrified me and I am not moisturising my hands like a fiend.

    Imperfect Momma - Aw, he is very romantic, I think he is just a little stressed that life isn't going as he planned.

    Amanda - Thank you! It's terrible the red tape and the hoops. GAH. But sadly, worth it.

    Siddy Says - Thank you! I like that "untangling" that's a perfect description.

    Anna - It's really quite head spinning, but it'll all be worth it in the end.

    Azra - Visas seem to always take forever! I wonder how to get on the "high priority" list.

    Alex - Thank you!

    Kyle - I must insist that Seba is there :)

    Many Colours of Happiness - It is SOOO frustrating.

    Jessica - I fluxuate between seeing the humour and sobbing big uncontrollable sobs.

    Alexa - yes, although aren't all couples engaged to be in engaged? Isn't that what being in a relationship is?

    Shell - Thank you! Me too!

    lady jennie - unfortunately, that isn't really a good option for us.

    jehlik501 - I know in the end, it'll all be worth it.

    Andi - THANK YOU! I very much appreciate that.

    Autumn - I feel confused too ... I just wish my lawyer could provide some answers.

    Oneika - Yay for having visas already sorted! I know doesn't it?

    Junebug - TWO MONTHS. ACK.

    Kelley - YES, so very much like that.

    Steph Anne - Thank you so much.

  35. Oh man! That sounds like such a stressful situation! Maybe he'll respond soon and you'll be able to get a game plan going so you can figure out whats best to do.