Friday, September 16, 2011

Mark your calenders people...Nov 8

Spring is springing in Melbourne.  When I moved here in 2008, I was prepared for a lot of things. I was prepared for the warmer climate, the reverse seasons, that there would be accent issues and language mis-slips.  But what I didn't know, what I couldn't prepare for was what spring would feel like without the melting snow, the muddy grass, and gradual climb to warmer days.

Melbourne Springs are windy. And each year, the wind catches me off guard.

Things are changing rapidly around me. So rapidly, I am having a hard time keeping up.  And for someone who doesn't handle change with grace, this brings more than a few challenges with it.  I started a new job last week.  And while so far it is fantastic, it is still new. I am still learning the ropes, learning my role, learning what is expected from me and what I need to achieve.

I haven't had any recent Attack of the Cysts episodes recently, but the fact that the ultrasound didn't show any problems has left me worried and unsure about what the next steps are to better diagnose my problem.

And on top of that, Inspector Climate and I made a date with the wedding registry and are getting married on November 8th.  There is very little planning involved there really, his grandparents and parents will come. My closest friend in Australia will come as my witness.  And while we tell ourselves this isn't the real wedding, this is the real deal. We will be really married after our 30 minute ceremony with the celebrant.  In fact, I refuse to call it our wedding. Our wedding will be in New England. We're just getting married. We're having a "getting married" ceremony. You know, as you do.

This is, needless to say, not how I pictured it.  And 'it' doesn't even begin to refer to the ceremony in and of its self.   Both my brothers were with their wives for nearly 10 years before they got married. Of course they met when they were in their teens. I just assumed that is how it would be for me.   But  I wasn't ready to meet a boy and fall in love when I was 18.  I had a lot of growing and self exploration to do.  I didn't picture being so worried about everyone's feelings - will my parents feel left out that their only daughter is getting married 15,000 miles away? Will people think it is silly for us to have the "real deal" wedding ceremony in 2013? What if no one is excited then? What if I'm not excited then? What if...?

One of my yoga instructors talks at length about using the seasons to help process emotions that we hold to.  And spring is the time for creating new habits and letting go of habits that no longer serve us.  Making room in our lives for the changes and growth that spring brings.  And so, I am striving to create new habits: I want to watch less tv, read more books, take advantage of sunny days and enjoy the new life that I am trying to cultivate.

My little tomato plant.

And with that, I am trying to let go of the things that don't serve me so well. To embrace the fantastic new changes that life has brought me, and put aside the worry and the fear of all those "what ifs."  I can't do it all today.  But I can start making the habits that will let me do it all for someday.

And until then, bitches, I am getting married on November 8th!!


  1. woo hoo, november 8th! while i know it's not what you envisaged for your wedding day, it's still something to get excited about. it's a huge deal and of course you can have another wedding back in the States but enjoy this day as much as possible!

  2. You're so strong and brave.. It's not so easy to have so many changes in your life! So, you're awesome :) And I am sure you will have wonderful real wedding!

  3. I don't deal so well with changes, either, but I'm told they make you stronger...or something. Congrats on Nov 8th!

  4. Yay for a date, even if it is just "getting married." Having a wedding later will be wonderful, too. I'm trying to let go of a lot of crap in my life lately, too, most of it in my own head. Like the idea of linking to seasons!

  5. Haha!! We'll have a cyber reception for you hows that!? lol
    Congrats again. And I'm loving the whole getting-rid-of-those-things-that-don't-serve-us... although it seems like we've skipped Spring and went straight into Summer here in SA :)

  6. Yay for getting married! I thought I wanted a big ceremony and stuff, but my quiet little ceremony at city hall with Max and his family was actually just fine for me! Whether or not you do a big wedding in the States one day is your decision, but I think you are getting married for the right reasons - because you love someone so much you'll do whatever it takes to stay with them.

    Oh can you tell us more about this new job??

  7. Yay! I realize that it is probably hard to be excited and I also get that you feel this isn't the way you wanted to get married, but I am still excited for you. You and IC obviously love each other and I know you'll continue to be great together. Everyone will still be excited for your "real" ceremony. Who could not be excited?! I'm excited! I admire you for reflecting on these things and knowing they bother you but going for it anyway. It makes you brave. Congrats on the new job too! Can't wait to hear more about it.

  8. I'm excited for you. Change is good..for the most part. Yet, stress prevails. Keep smiling. Stay strong.

  9. Congrats on having a date! Although it's not exactly how you had wanted things to plan out, it is definitely something you will remember for ever, and have an amazing time! :)

  10. Congratulations! That's exciting! And it seems you're in just the right mindset for lots of life change :-) Funny - you're talking spring and here it's the first day that it's gotten chilly enough to feel fall coming.

  11. It's so interesting that it's just "spring" in Melbourne while here in the states it's starting to become Fall! I'd love to visit another country to see the differences in weather and seasons sometime.

    Wow, Nov. 8th!!! Sooo exciting!!!! When will you be getting married in New England? So fun :) Happy Weekend!

  12. november 8th is the big day!! :D congrats! Im not a fan of changes, but if it has to happen then *sigh* gotta deal with it I suppose!

  13. Congrats on the upcoming wedding. :)

    Learning the ropes in a new job is always challenging but you will eventually be fine. Take your time. :)

  14. YAY!!!!!! Excited for you. This is a beautifully written post and I m glad you obliged by putting a few pics!!!

  15. When I got married, my favorite parts of they day weren't the big ones where lots of people were around. I loved the private and quiet ones between me and my husband amid a day of chaos. I think it's great your first wedding gets to be more intimate, then the big party later. CONGRATS on getting married!!

    Thanks for stopping by my blog! Hope you do so again. :)


  16. Nov 8 cannot come soon enough...WOOHO!!! So excited for you. Can't wait to see pictures :) :)

    <3-Cami from First Day of My Life

  17. hopefully this will ease your mind about people not being excited come 2013 for the real deal wedding... but there's this terrible, brain-cells dying when you watch it television show in the US where this couple has had a wedding EACH year... for the last 16 years. and everyone involved is just as excited about it as if its the first wedding.

  18. Congrats on setting a date for your getting married ceremony! I'm sure people will understand the situation. Good for you on embracing those changes in your life and moving on. Its a hard thing to do.

  19. Congrats! As wonderful as weddings can be, what truly matters is the person you plan on spending your life with. So it's fantastic that you've found this kind of love at all. Cheers to you and your husband to be! And as for change, I'm like you, but I've learned to just take it one day at a time. : )

  20. Congrats! My date is November 26th, and time is just flying by!

  21. YAY!!!!! Congrats again honey. And BELIEVE ME I know how you feel with the "This is not how I pictured it." I think - I guess - life is never how we expected it. Or some shit.


  22. I am so glad you stopped by my blog so I could find yours! I am not good with change so I commend you for handling so many so well! Also congrats on November 8th, that's my birthday!! :)

  23. Now where did you move from? The states?

  24. Wow!!! How exciting that you're getting married in just a few months!! I think no matter what people think, it's your wedding and that's what matters!

  25. Hi D!!

    I know what you mean when you talk about not accepting change too well, I'm just the same :)) BUT I'm so excited!! I know the wedding seems just like a formality till the time your fairytale big day comes along but Madam I hope you have the most fabulous day you ever could have imagined!!


  26. I am terrible with change but it sounds like you're handling everything darn well! Yay for you!

  27. November the 8th is a good date! ;D
    That rhymes! :D

    I really like your blog; I'll be following you from now on. :)

  28. That's a very exciting development. I'm glad you're going to do the New England wedding too. Best of both worlds.

  29. CONGRATULATIONS. :) November 8th is a special day not only because of your wedding now but because it's my birrrthddayyyyyy!!!
    Twitter: @GlamKitten88

  30. November 8th, that so soon and I can't wait to see photos!!! Change is always scary but it lets us know we're still alive. Its such a good thing for the soul!

  31. November 8th, when I started fitness. A very pleasant day for me, and apparently for you too! Congrats :).

  32. Best Wishes on your upcoming wedding. Moving always has adjustments and it's always a great adventure!

    Thank you for stopping bye my site. If you need more Fall and Winter "fixes" visit my blog from time to time. I will be thinking about your Spring and Summer while we are buried beneath the snow! ~Diane

  33. I went through the exact same thing when Seba and I got married. We also had to do a "registro civil" "wedding" and I was so anti-that ceremony that I refused to kiss Seba when the officiant said, "You may not kiss the bride." I was angry because we told the officiant that this was not our real ceremony and she kept trying to make it be special when I wanted it to be not real and not special because it wasn't fair that my family couldn't be there.

    I'm lucky that my family was not at all upset, they knew it was something I had to do and that two trips down to Chile in one year was unrealistic so nobody made a fuss. Seba's parents tried to have us have a celebratory dinner and we wouldn't let them. I guess it sounds kind of rude looking back, but we didn't (and still don't) consider that our wedding because my family couldn't be there...and two halves make a whole, not one.

    That was almost five years ago and I can safely say I have almost zero memory of the day I legally became Seba's wife in the eyes of the Chilean government and I can safely say, I don't care. I remember our wedding ceremony, the real one, every detail burned into my mind. Even though it wasn't the "official" one according to visas and paperwork and government bureaucracy crap, it was official to us.

  34. over the past few years i've seen a trend happening more and more where people get "weddinged." that's what they call it, because they did the marriage at city hall, and later held a wedding with all of their loved ones {}. i think it's easy to feel like the actual wedding will somehow feel less-than if it's after the legal marriage, but i don't think it has to be that way. the wedding is a ceremony of promises in the presence of your support group, plus a wicked celebration! which will all still be just as meaningful in a couple years. with that said, congratulations for nov. 8!

  35. SJ - Thank you!

    Marina - Hah! Oh Thank, I am not feeling very brave.

    Amy - Thanks! Oh, is that what change does?

    Jessica - yes, it is certainly all projected issues I am dealing with.

    Azra - That sounds fantastic!

    Crystal - You know I never thought I wanted a big deal either, until now.

    Teachergirl - Aw, thank you! I never ever question marrying IC - How could I? He's fab.

    Ellie - Yes, just have to manage the stress.

    Feedingbrainandbody - thanks! Yes, it will be amazing.

    Lisa - I know, that is the crazy thing about being in a different hemisphere.

    Holly - Probably not until 2013 in New England.

    Pop Champagne - Exactly, change happens always, so might as well jump on board.

    Glee - Aw, thanks!

    Oneika - I am trying to add more pics, just for you!

    Angela - Aw, thank you for your insight!

    Cami - YAY! all y'all excitement is contagious.

    Olivia dee - Ok that is crazy! But I lvoe that everyone is still thrilled.

    imperfect momma - It is so hard.

    Monster Cakes - Yes, that is what really matters.

    Missa Lee - Oh wow! Congratulations to you too!

    Rach - I know, so soon!

    Ev Rev - Thank you! I know, life is kind of a bitch like that isn't it?

    Tessa - Well, the 8th must be good luck then!

    Ashley - Yes, I moved from the US to Austrlia in 2008

    Happy LIttle Trees - thank you!

    Crazy Shenanigans - I know I know! :) YAy!

    Nutrisystem - Aw, thank you! I just got my camera and I'm a little obsessed with messing with the depth of field.

    Siddy - Thank you so much. It's hard being brave. :)

    Lily - Thank you!

    Krysten - I think you're handling change pretty well too!

    my day in a sentence - and as I always say, if it rhymes you know its true.

    Susan - Yes, it's really important to me that my family be there.

    Bonnie - Your birthday too! That's crazy. I now know three bdays on my wedding date!

    Aqui - It is so soon! We would have done it sooner if we could too. But ICs family is out of town for all of October.

    Neatfit - sounds like it's an important day in a lot of people's lives :)

    Crave Cute - I certainly will be stopping by! I miss autumn!

    Kyle - YES. SO MUCH YES. IC doesn't really get it. He feels like we have to make it a kinda big deal so that his grandparents get to come to our wedding (they won't make it to the US).

    Kimbirdy - Thank you so much! You always make me feel better and less crazy. Maybe I should hire you as my therapist :)

  36. YAY for you two! You are super smart to keep it low key. Weddings always seem to get bogged down in wedding stuff (I just did the wedding thing myself). We did it for the paperwork (expat life and all that) but even so it's still a wonderful thing! I wish you all the love and none of the stress on Nov 8th!