Friday, March 16, 2012

I'm wearing new pants...angry pants.


Since surgery, the best way to describe me is angry and agitated. I hold it together at work (which I'm still enjoying BT dubs). And then I get home, and I lose all ability to control my temper and my emotions.  Poor Inspector Climate can do no right - he is always standing in the Gosh Darn Wrong Spot. All the time. I MEAN SERIOUSLY. I want to go to the sink. He's standing at the sink. I want to put veggies in the pan ... he's in front of the stove!

I'm not sure if I can blame surgery - perhaps something with my hormones has changed since Jorge has been ousted.  Or maybe I'm still adjusting to my new routine at work. Or maybe I'm having really bad withdrawal symptoms because I haven't done yoga in over 2 months. Whatever the reasons, I'm not a big fan of the amount of angry that is consuming me.

This rage is a totally new thing for me. Sure, I've dabbled in depression - who hasn't it?

And there was that good nine months when I was on the pill that I cried four times a day.

And while that was hard, it was only me. Sure, Inspector Climate could only cuddle me as I sat on his kitchen floor sobbing - but I wasn't yelling at him, I wasn't involving him in the chemical twists of my brain. I certainly wasn't angry with him for things that are so minute I can't even believe I get so upset about them 15 minutes later.

I'm sure it will pass - as I learned last week, all things are permerary.  And until then, don't mind me - I've got a lot to be pissed off about you know? A sweet husband, a nice albeit moldy apartment, a job I love, and friends all around the world (that's you!).

33 comments:

  1. I have a moldy apartment, too. We're so lucky.

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  2. those pants remind me of that cartoon AHH! Monsters!

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  3. I hope you feel better soon! As you say, everything is temporary, although it's sometimes hard to keep telling yourself this at the time.

    I bought similar pants for a little boy I used to nanny, with a giant frog face on the bum. They got sooo many comments ;)

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  4. PS- I'm hosting a giveaway if you'd like to enter! Click here

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  5. Hmmm.....this might be a coincidence but we used to live in a moldy apartment and it made me very unwell. Especially when the weather got a bit damper/cooler and the mold increased. Yuck. It was life changing moving out of there (and I mean that literally).

    Whatever the cause, I bet you that my voodoo-practising Chinese doctor can help with it. A few months ago I went to him and said "I've got nothing to feel sad about, but I feel like a river of sadness is flowing through me" and he had a solution for that.

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  6. I hope things get better soon. Hormones are so crazy sometimes and we all get a little like that.

    Take some time to yourself and relax (and don't feel guilty. I think we get like that sometimes).

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  7. i hope you feel better soon hon!! my hormones have been really whacked out lately too.. i know because everytime i start talking my husband has this frightened deer in the head lights look hahahahaha.

    those angry pants are hilarious!!! :)

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  8. Ahh I hope it's only temporary for you.. maybe a combo of all the things you've mentioned??

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  9. This sounds exactly like how I am once a month!!!

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  10. Such adorable angry pants!

    Sometimes, we just have to be angry. I'm sure the yoga will help when that happens.

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  11. Oooh, you know I can relate! I highly doubt you have a mood disorder but I bet a change in hormones has occurred which effs everything up. And WOW it sucks to be our husbands around then! My poor husband is currently the worst person EVER. He didn't do anything, he just is. I told him he should do some therapy. :P

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  12. P.S. I am pretty sure I need some of those pants in my size.

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  13. Aww hang in there sweetie! I know how you feel, my BC makes me sad and pissy all the damn time. HORMONES ARE THE DEVIL.

    I really like your blog <3

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  14. Chin up buttercup! I literally came home from work yesterday and started sobbing. Mind you, it was a rough day, but your significant other is there to be in the way :)

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  15. We have mold in our bathroom roof and we're getting it re-painted next week as it's driving me crazy! Those crazy pants are TOO darn cute! x

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  16. Mold can affect your health! Have you checked that out?
    In any case, I hope you feel better soon!!

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  17. Well, at least your angry pants are cute. I hope you trade them in for some happy pants instead. I'm really sorry you're having a rough patch. It is okay to be angry sometimes. It is a valid emotion. I'm sure the inspector will be happy to listen and help. Reading the last line of your post, you're a lucky lady!! Glad to be an international friend

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  18. Ever since my knee surgery last fall, I haven't done yoga and I totally have seen my anger-meter go up!

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  19. dude, it's totally the yoga withdrawl. i get stabby without my regular running/yoga routine. the rage, it consumes me. once we are able to do our normal human things again, we will start acting like normal humans. it will come.

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  20. I hope you're feeling a little less angry now!

    But I have to say those pants in that picture are pretty brilliant!

    Have a great weekend!

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  21. Sorry you're dealing with this, lady. Important thing is to not beat yourself up about it. It's not your fault. I've dealt a lot with depression too & sometimes it was accompanied by anger at my sweet Hubby for stupid things. Eventually (& I mean that..it wasn't easy) I was able to recognize when I was starting to boil & I would go into the bathroom for a few minutes & just talk myself through it. I came out when I figured out why I was really mad & talk to him about it, or I would just decide to get over it & let it go. Exercising reeeeally helps me too so that could be a lot of it as well.

    Hang in there! Sending love from SLC, UT, USA :o)

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  22. Aww!! But that picture is AWESOME.

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  23. I agree with some of the others in that you have had a lot going on in the last little while, and it might just be your mind's way of dealing with it. It most likely IS just a temporary thing, and as soon as you are feeling 100% again, your mood will improve. In the meantime, feel free to wear those kick ass angry pants.

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  24. I just read like twenty of your latest posts so here I go catching up on all of them with one comment on this. First things first, congrats on being permerary!

    Second, I'm SO sorry you had that awful experience with the lawyer. I always feel so stupid stupid STUPID when stuff happens like that. And I'm always so embarrassed and don't want to tell Seba...but then when I do, he inevitably does things like give me a hug and then says, "It's only money," (a phrase he likes to repeat at times when he's also lost $1,100 dollars worth of airline vouchers, AAAARGH).

    But if it makes you feel better that sort of thing happens to me all the time and on LITTLE stuff. At least with the lawyer thing it's easy to see how that mistake could've been made. But for instance, I took our clothes to the dry cleaners and the guy handed me the bill and it was really expensive. I thought it was expensive, but I also had a lot of clothes so I figured I was just paying for the quantity. Then I told a Chilean friend and she said, "Did you seriously just pay that much money for dry-cleaning?!? They gave you the gringa price." And then I felt taken. And like an idiot. It's just the worst feeling.

    So yeah. I feel your pain.

    And please, change your pants :)

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  25. Those pants are ADORABLE! I hope you feel better.

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  26. Just sending lots of hugs your way! I'm very familiar with how crazy extreme hormone changes can make a girl, so I don't blame you at all for needing to be at the sink RIGHT THIS DAMN MINUTE!!! Hope your mood evens out soon :)

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  27. I love those pants!!
    i hope things start to get better for you soon. hang in there!!

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  28. you can never underestimate hormones and how they effect your mood. the whole PMS thing can be a bit cliche (and i hate it when men blame it for actually being angry for good reason) but you've had a major operation and some things are possibly out of whack.
    i hope you feel happier soon!!

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  29. E - YES! We used the clove oil and it did quite well to kill some of the mold - i'd highly recommend it.

    Morgan - Yes! totally. Monsters.

    Lisa - Hah, I can only imagine they would. I've been considering knitting a pair of these ones :)

    Belinda - I've also been unwell in moldy apartments - but it has never effected my mood..only my lungs!

    Gracie - Aw, thank you!

    Lisa - Oh no! Hah, it hasn't gotten that bad with IC yet. But I'm sure soon he'll look a bit scared.

    Kate - Totally, I bet it is a combo.

    Chanel - Hah! I wish I could blame this on the monthly stuff. But sadly, I've only had one or two good days this month!

    Ellie - I miss yoga so!

    Sara - yes! I had to get off BC for that very reason. I was only sad. Very very very sad.

    Amanda - SOs are so kind aren't they....

    Strings and buttons - I think in our apartment they've repainted over the mold several times! Not a good idea.

    Teacher girl - I've experienced other things that mold effects - like my lungs! But I'm not sure it would be effecting me quite like this. Maybe!

    Krysten - I KNOW.

    Poptartyogini - See if I was sad, I'd totally agree. but the truth is, I get angry at him for EVERYTHING.

    The Zadge - so there is hope that I'll go back to "normal" once I start yoga!?

    Bridget - Another vote for withdrawl! WOO HoO! I mean.

    Niina - I'm doing ok today! Thanks for asking :)

    Mrs C - Aw, thank you for this very sweet comment.

    Oneika - I KNOW RIGHT?!

    Crystal - Thank you for the vote of confidence!!

    Kyle - OH NO! That sounds horrible. I still find it so incredibly that they can get away with "gringa prices!" That's horrible!

    Nicole - Aw, thank you!

    Angela - stupid hormones, I hate letting them win!

    Momto8 - they're fab aren't they?

    SJ - I'm totally with you! I hate blaming anything on stupid hormones, I feel like I should be able to control them myself. But sometimes...

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  30. You're a light weight, I idle at angry.

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  31. Hang in there! Your happiness will return!

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  32. Blargh, I hope you feel better soon. Sometimes I have days like that and I don't even have a legitimate excuse

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