I find Meg Ryan movies strangely comforting when I'm a bit sad. I don't know if it's because they feel like home when I was a kid and my mom and I would make a giant bowl of popcorn with butter and brewer's yeast and watch When Harry Met Sally; You've Got Mail; Addicted to Love; Sleepless in Seattle...
And this week the only sadnesses has been that I'm truly tired and Inspector Climate has been away all week.
Inspector Climate and I are one of those couples that are much better when we're together. Does that even make sense? When we get to be together 24/7 we never bicker, we never fight, we never even disagree - but as soon as the hours get long at work or social engagements keep us from having heaps of time together things get less peachy.
I mean, I know all couples aren't perfection all the time - I'm not that naive.
What I'm really saying is that I'm a bit of a child still.
You know when you were a kid and you held it together at school all day - and didn't even realise you were holding it together, but then when you got home you'd see your parents and just break down a bit. You'd be grouchy and maybe even cry a bit? Like just being around people who *have* to love you made it okay to lose it?
Well, Inspector Climate now is the person who I don't have to hold it together around anymore. So after long days at work or mistakes which have been made (and there are always mistakes made) or whatever it is that makes days long, tiring, sad, or discomforting; he's the one who I can just be me.
I don't have to put on a strong face or happy face like I do at work or in front of my family. I don't have to put my best foot forward or get out on the right side of the bed everyday or whatever your "happy" saying of choice is. No, I can be horrible, sad, disgruntled, frustrated - I don't have to hold it together.
I think what really happens is when we don't get to spend heaps of time together, I spend the time we do letting go from all that "holding it in" - but the more time we spend together, the more I can just be me.