Hello. How are you?
Me? Jetlagged thanks.
You're my number one choice when it comes to flying at very fast speeds through the air for tens of thousands of miles. I'm a Qantas frequent flyer - and no matter that you sometimes cost more. I choose you. You're the airline for me.
However, I'm starting to pick up hints that the feeling isn't mutual. Maybe it's that I've fallen in love and have a new person in my life that means more to me than you? I don't know Qantas - but I do know this: you're doing all you can to make sure Inspector Climate and I stay apart.
He's in 72 C and I'm in 76 B. He's in 54B and I'm in 55B...He's - oh you get the point.
What's up with that? What's with all the hate. Here's the thing, we book together, we have the same booking number and yet, and yet - you seat us apart. I'm not a fan.
And to further that complaint, when we check in HOURS before our flight and suggest that maybe you're selfishly keeping us - the lovebirds - apart, you wouldn't let us change our seats.
This isn't just a one time occurrence either - in fact, the only time we've been originally seated together is our last trip from Dallas to Brisbane when we made the decision to pay you an extra $25 per seat to make sure we did. That's kind unacceptable don't you think? Why you gotta be like that, Qantas?
PS When I called to ask if there was a place on your planes to hang up my wedding dress for the 14 hour flight...I did not mean so that I could stuff it in the overhead compartment. So when you assured me that of course you have a place for clothes bags, what I thought you meant was "on our planes we have a place for clothes bags" - silly me.
PPS What happened to the mini Cadbury chocolate bars you used to give as snacks?