Thursday, November 07, 2013

NaBloPoMo Day 7: I had forgotten this had ever happened to me.

Today as I was struggling to figure out what to post (Oy, it's only day 7!), I took a little trip down memory lane into my blog archives. I thought maybe something would jog my memory and I'd come out with a great new story to share...Instead, I found a story which I had TOTALLY forgotten that had ever occurred in my life - which I think is one of the very many reasons why I blog. This happened just few months before I met Inspector Climate, but mere days after I'd broken with someone who I really liked.

This was back when I dabbled in Internet Dating...and then this happened. Remember, I had never met this person...Enjoy.

So, I've dived back into the dating site with a vengeance. And there has been a guy (Persistent Guy [PG]), who every time I talked to him he asked me out a date. Which was a nice change from a certain slurpee connoisseur that we all know and adore. Anyway, so I agreed to go on a date with PG 730 at The Designated Spot on Tuesday night.

I get there at 715, because I am perpetually early, and I wait.

735...I wait. I see a pirate dressed as a colonel. Followed by Einstein.

745...I wait. An old man starts shouting "THOSE WERE THE KEATING YEARS. THE LYING KEATING YEARS" and then walks off.

750...I wait. I know what you're thinking, why didn't you call him? I HATE THE PHONE, PEOPLE.

8...I finally text him, "Um, PG? you close by?"

805...He calls me. "Who is this" he says.
Me: YOU CALLED ME. But it's D.
Him: Can you prove that?
Me: Um, no, but it's me.
Him: Where are you?
Me: At the Designated Spot, where are you?
Him: Can you give the phone to some one there to prove that you're there?
Me: Um, no.
Him: Well, how do I know you're there.
Me (getting distressed and creeped out): WHY WOULD I LIE?
Him: Seriously, can't you just talk to someone who works at The Designated Spot give them the phone and prove it. Because it doesn't SOUND like you're at The Designated Spot.
Me: You know what? Goodbye.

I hung up and walked to the tram stop. He calls again. And I answer, because....???

Him: Look, I just need to make sure you're not my stalker...
Me: is she American? Because this is the only accent I got.
Him: No...
Me: Than it isn't me!
Him: Where are you now?
Me: I am about to get on the tram to go home...
Him: It doesn't sound like you're at the tram stop.
Me: You're really freaking me out, and I am going home. Goodbye.

He calls me 10 more times and leaves two messages and I ignore each one. I finally check my voice mail and he has put my name down for the wrong number in his phone and so when he called that person they were clearly nonplussed by his questioning about this so called date. A semi-honest mistake.

He calls again (living up to his name...), I answer. Why? You ask. WHY? Well, to be honest, I thought I was going to tell him off. I thought I was going to say, "YOU BLEW IT DUFUS."

So he starts apologising. He starts grovelling. He is so sorry. He says "I acted like a dickhead" and I, uncharacteristically say, "you WERE a dickhead." He says, "babe [and I vomit in my mouth], I am so sorry. Don't go home come out with me. Please, let me make this up to you. Please. Please? I owe you dinner. I am so sorry." I say, "Don't you see it as a problem that you haven't even met me yet and don't trust me?"

This is why you don't date people from the internet, internets.


Needless to say, I ended up never meeting PG. And thank goodness, this one story is enough to last me a life time of PG drama.


  1. This story is magical. I mean, it sucks that it happened to you. But it's pretty much the most hilarious thing ever, so at least you got a good story out of it?

  2. Wow this dude had some serious trust issues. What on earth?

  3. Replies
    1. I think you did comment on the originally post!

  4. Haha! This is amazing. I sometimes actually miss dating, just for all the wacky stories.

  5. Oh wow, that is such a weird story. I'm glad it wasn't me. Those phone calls are so painfully awkward...and he just acted very strange!

  6. Ha. Thanks for digging that one up out of the archives. Very entertaining!

  7. That... is scary. I'm always a bit worried about these cases turning into Craigslist killer cases.

    7% Solution

  8. Holy date from hell Batgirl! Those dating years; OY. But I totally have something to post about now! So thanks! LOL ... getting burnt out on NaBlo 7 days in... sounds like a trend. - And for the record, I am a phone a phone. I WILL NOT talk on a phone a second longer than I have to, and the cell phone - Forget It! I text. Thats about it. Drives my husband nuts, nut it's how I roll.

  9. that was phone-a-phobe ... spellcheck got me - ACK!

  10. wow... just wow.

    Freaking scary. I don't know if I would ever try dating after that! People are crazy!

    XO Lourdes

  11. Seriously people like this dude are out in the world and that's why I'm single!